Cheryl Wallach from The Calgary Humane Society dropped by today, for her final visit on behalf of CHS. She’s been with them for over 16 years, but decided she’d like to pursue documentary-making. We wish Cheryl well with her future plans! She was accompanied by a sweet dog on her visit. Chesney is a 2 year old mix, weighing in at 20-25 lbs. She’s very attentive, and affectionate. She’ll need a little help interacting with other dogs. You can see her and all sorts of other great pets at CalgaryHumane.ca

Calgary has a Panhandler epidemic. And it’s getting worse, because people are giving money to these people. DON’T GIVE MONEY TO PANHANDLERS! By doing so you become part of the problem, not the solution. Listen:

Stop Panhandling

Is it really neccesary to shower more than once in an 8-hour period, if all you’ve done is sit behind a desk and talked occasionally. Especially if, like Greg, you claim to never sweat, even when strenuously excercising? Well, Greg thought he needed a shower before the movie, the second shower in 8 hours. Listen:

Greg wants a shower

Greg and I often hang out and go to grab food at restaurants. Trying to find a restaurant that meets with Greg’s strict, but crazy, needs is a giant pain. We recently went to a restaurant in an old house, with a really nice diverse menu. I found it delicious! Whitebread (Greg) didn’t enjoy it nearly as much. Listen:

Greg and Restaurants

I enjoy almonds, and other foods that contain “good” fat. Fat your body needs to be healthy. Greg, who is really thin - almost fat-free - believes there’s no such thing as good fat. Listen:

Good Fat Audio

So I recently met this youngish girl. In that transitional phase between high school and university. Pretty girl. She likes to shop, and likes the nicer stuff. Here’s the problem. When you’re at that stage in life, your income doesn’t match your expensive tastes. What to do? Well, look forward to a time when you’ll have an income that matches your tastes. Perservere. Improvise. Find your own style that doesn’t cost a ton. Realize that labels are kinda useless. Or…become a prostitute. Sort of. Find a guy a little bit older, with some money, who will buy you all the nice things you want, and let you live the lifestyle you want in exchange for being his “girlfriend.” Money (gifts, nice things) for sex (girlfriend thing) = prostitution.

Calgary is a wealthy city, and this isn’t an isolated incident. It’s not just women who are to blame. You see these guys cruising 17th in their fancy cars (Lambos, Porsches, Escalades, H2s) with bad dance music blaring, oversize sunglasses on. All the money in a world can’t buy a personality. Lots of wealthy guys are bankrupt when it comes to intellect or personality. But there are plenty of women who eat this shit up. Instead of asking what you’re reading, they ask what you’re driving. Instead of asking what you think about, they ask what you make (about.)

This is not to say that there aren’t wealthy guys who aren’t douchebags. In my circle of friends, there are some people that make a really good living. But none of us flaunt it, or use it to get ahead socially. It’s secondary to personality and being human.

Is it just me?

Click for the audio

You could say that Jer Wayne Junior and Turleen are Barbie’s embarrassing cousins. Turleen comes barefoot and pregnant with her hair in curlersand a cigarette in her mouth. Squeeze her belly and she’ll tell you “Pour me a double. I’m drinking fer two” and “Bubba Jr. get off yer sister!” Jer Wayne Junior sports all the redneck essentials like a mullet, missing teeth, NASCAR tattoo, cigarette, dirty tanktop and a beer in hand. Press his chest and he’ll fart and whisper sweet nothings like “Fifteen of them beers and yer still ugly” and “Honest, I’m not lying through my tooth.” The dolls sell for $33 and come in a patriotic red, white and blue window display box.

• Dial-up Internet Access: Dial-up connections have fallen from 40% in 2001 to 10% in 2008. The combination of an infrastructure to accommodate affordable high speed Internet connections and the disappearing home phone have all but pounded the final nail in the coffin of dial-up Internet access.
• Movie Rental Stores: While Netflix is looking up at the moment, Blockbuster keeps closing store locations by the hundreds. It still has about 6,000 left across the world, but those keep dwindling and the stock is down considerably in 2008, especially since the company gave up a quest of Circuit
  City. Movie Gallery, which owned the Hollywood Video brand, closed up shop earlier this year. Countless small video chains and mom-and-pop stores have given up the ghost already.
• Classified Ads: The Internet has made so many things obsolete that newspaper classified ads might sound like just another trivial item on a long list. But this is one of those harbingers of the future that could signal the end of civilization as we know it. The argument is that if newspaper classifieds are replaced by free online listings at sites like Craigslist.org and Google Base, then newspapers are not far behind them.
• Yellow Pages: This year will be pivotal for the global Yellow Pages industry. Much like newspapers, print Yellow Pages will continue to bleed dollars to their various digital counterparts, from Internet Yellow Pages (IYPs), to local search engines and combination search/listing services like ReachLocal and Yodle. Factors like an acceleration of the print “fade rate” and the looming recession will contribute to the onslaught. One research firm predicts the falloff in usage of newspapers and print Yellow Pages could even reach 10% this year — much higher than the 2%-3% fade rate seen in past years.
• Answering Machines: The increasing disappearance of answering machines is directly tied to the decline of landlines. According to USA Today, the number of homes that only use cell phones jumped 159% between 2004 and 2007. It has been particularly bad in New York; since 2000, landline usage has dropped 55%. It’s logical that as cell phones rise, many of them replacing traditional landlines, that there will be fewer answering machines.
• Cameras That Use Film: It doesn’t require a statistician to prove the rapid disappearance of the film camera in America. Just look to companies like Nikon, the professional’s choice for quality camera equipment. In 2006, it announced that it would stop making film cameras, pointing to the shrinking market — only 3% of its sales in 2005, compared to 75% of sales from digital cameras and equipment.
• Stand-Alone Bowling Alleys: BowlingBalls.US claims there are still 60 million Americans who bowl at least once a year, but many are not bowling in stand-alone bowling alleys. Today most new bowling alleys are part of facilities for all types or recreation including laser tag, go-karts, bumper cars, video game arcades, climbing walls and glow miniature golf. Bowling lanes also have been added to many non-traditional venues such as adult communities, hotels and resorts, and gambling casinos.
• Hand-Written Letters: In 2006, the Radicati Group estimated that, worldwide, 183 billion e-mails were sent each day. Two million each second. By November of 2007, an estimated 3.3 billion Earthlings owned cell phones, and 80% of the world’s population had access to cell phone coverage. In 2004, half-a-trillion text messages were sent, and the number has no doubt increased exponentially since then. So where amongst this gorge of gabble is there room for the elegant, polite hand-written letter?
• Drive-in Theaters: During the peak in 1958, there were more than 4,000 drive-in theaters in this country, but in 2007 only 405 drive-ins were still operating. Exactly zero new drive-ins have been built since 2005. Only one reopened in 2005 and five reopened in 2006, so there isn’t much of a movement toward reviving the closed ones.
• Analog TV: According to the Consumer Electronics Association, 85% of homes in the U.S. get their television programming through cable or satellite providers. For the remaining 15% — or 13 million individuals — who are using rabbit ears or a large outdoor antenna to get their local stations, change is in the air. If you are one of these people you’ll need to get a new TV or a converter box in order to get the new stations which will only be broadcast in digital.

courtesy of Consumerist

We get plenty of Telemarketers calling to the station, and the occasional survey. I took this survey call about education in Calgary:

Survey Says

What appears to be the tracklisting for Guitar Hero IV: World Tour has leaked online. The game is expected out this winter. Here’s the list:

‘Dope Nose’ - Weezer
‘The Middle’ - Jimmy Eat World
‘Today’ - Smashing Pumpkins
‘Roland’ - Interpol
‘Santeria’ - Sublime
‘Mr Brightside’ - The Killers
‘Take It On The Run’ - REO Speedwagon
‘Hold The Line’ - Toto
‘Rebel Yell’ - Billy Idol
‘Heartbreaker’ - Pat Benatar
‘All Around Me’ - Flyleaf
‘Misery Business’ - Paramore
‘Stinkfist’ - Tool
‘Lateralus’ - Tool
‘Schism’ - Tool
‘Every Breath You Take’ - The Police
‘The Kids Aren’t Alright’ - The Offspring
‘The Good Left Undone’ - Rise Agaisnt
‘Bleed It Out’ - Linkin Park
‘Face Down’ - The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
‘The Kill’ - 30 Seconds to Mars
‘Thank You For The Venom’ - My Chemical Romance
‘Dammit’ - Blink 182
‘When You Heat Stops Beating’ - +44
‘Jumpin’ Jack Flash’ - The Rolling Stones
‘Don’t Fear The Reaper’ - Blue Öyster Cult
‘Light My Fire’ - The Doors
‘Give It Away’ - Red Hot Chili Peppers
‘Renegades Of Funk’ - Rage Against The Machines
‘No Sleep ‘Til Brooklyn’ - The Beastie Boys
‘Are You Gonna Go My Way?’ - Lenny Kravitz
‘I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing’ - Aerosmith
‘Man In The Box’ - Alice In Chains
‘Kickstart My Heart’ - Mötley Crüe
‘Spin The Black Circle’ - Pearl Jam
‘Smells Like Teen Spirit’ - Nirvana
‘Car Chase City’ - Tenacious D
‘Everlong’ - Foo Fighters
‘Animal’ - Def Leppard
‘Runaway’ - Bon Jovi
‘Paradise City’ - Guns N’ Roses
‘Song For The Dead’ - Queens of the Stone Age
‘Vasoline’ - Stone Temple Pilots
‘Assassin’ - Muse
‘The Boys Are Back in Town’ - Thin Lizzy
‘Life in the Fast Lane’ - The Eagles
‘Sweet Home Alabama’ - Lynyrd Skynyrd
‘Here to Stay’ - KoRn
‘Dragula’ - Rob Zombie
‘Bat Country’ - Avenged Sevenfold
‘10,000 Fists’ - Disturbed
‘Duality’ - Slipknot
‘Toxicity’ - System of a Down
‘Demise of Sanity’ - Black Label Society
‘Don’t Talk to Strangers’ - Dio
‘Heaven and Hell’ - Black Sabbath
‘Crazy Train’ - Ozzy Osbourne
‘The Spirit Of Radio’ - Rush
‘Comfortably Numb’ - Pink Floyd
‘Pull Me Under’ - Dream Theater
‘Beat It’ - Micheal Jackson Feat. Eddie Van Halen
‘Hot For Teacher’ - Van Halen
‘Stranglehold’ - Ted Nugent
‘Warriors Of Time’ - Black Tide
‘Leather Rebel’ - Judas Priest
‘Hallowed Be Thy Name’ - Iron Maiden
‘Angel Of Death’ - Slayer
‘Tornado Of Souls’ - Megadeth
‘Master Of Puppets’ - Metallica
‘Johnny B Goode’ - Chuck Berry
‘The Wind Cries Mary’ - Jimi Hendrix
‘Purple Haze (Live)’ - Jimi Hendrix
‘45′ - Shinedown
‘96 Quite Bitter Beings’ - CKY
‘Bombshell’ - Powerman 5000
‘Clavado en un Bar’ - Maná
‘Enjoy the Silence’ - Lacuna Coil
‘Feuer Frei’ - Rammstein
‘Fury Of The Storm’ - Dragonforce
‘Never Too Late’ - The Answer
‘Nottingham Lace’ - Buckethead
‘One Armed Scissor’ - At The Drive-In
‘Satch Boogie’ - Joe Satriani
‘Schrei’ - Tokio Hotel
‘Soul Doubt’ - NOFX